It’s 7:24 on a Saturday night. I’m at Chicago’s Park West Theater. Soon, Dada will take the stage. It’s my first time seeing them. I’m really looking forward to it.

I go to a lot of shows. More often than not, I go alone. It took a while, but I finally figured it out — if I want to go to a show, I GO! I don’t have time to wait for friends to make up their minds. It would be nice to be here with someone. But if it doesn’t work out, there are no strangers amongst a crowd here for the same purpose.

I’m always happy when someone goes to a show with me. I’ll invite you, but be prepared, because I have a few rules, and some of them aren’t flexible.

Allow me to make my case. Here are the Official Guidelines for Catching a Gig with Ced:

1. When I invite you, be quick with your answer. Most times, I learn about shows plenty early. That means tickets go on sale long before the show. But that’s no excuse not to be ready to buy a ticket when they become available. Concerts tend to sell out quickly in Chicago. You have to be on top of things.

If the show is in a theater or somewhere with reserved seating, I want to buy my ticket the day they go on sale! So, if I call you, it’ll be well in advance. Be ready! Get all your scheduling and spouse passes taken care of. If you hesitate, I’m going without you. I’m not getting crappy seats because you haven’t done your job. This rule is non-negotiable.^

Now, if the show is a standing general admission affair, you’ll get a little more leeway. If you change your mind after saying “no” or “I’ll see,” we can still be in good shape. I’ll make sure we’re up front. Which leads me to the next rule.

2. We’re getting there STUPID early. Not only do I insist on having a good view at a standing gig, but I have to protect a lower back in the throes of lumbar stenosis. The pain can be searing at times. I’ll need something to lean on. That’s usually the barrier in front of the stage. Plus, I can sit on the floor and rest my back without people almost tripping over me, which I’ll do before the show starts and between acts.

I like to be one of the first dozen or so people into the venue. I’m all but guaranteed a spot up front. If I’m late, I’ll stay at the back and lean on the barrier surrounding the mixing board. The sound guy usually doesn’t care as long as you don’t do anything to disrupt him. Today, I was about the tenth person through the door.

If you’re running late to a GA gig and I’m already there, I’ll cut you some slack and do what I can to save you a place next to me. Hopefully, things will work out.

The rest of the rules are a personal choice to make my experience more enjoyable. But you might like to join in.

3. Take a picture of the empty stage. One of the things I love about live music is the anticipation that comes from the band coming out and picking up their instruments to the sound of the cheering audience. (What I wouldn’t give to have that experience just ONCE.) My anticipation is enhanced by the sight of the instruments on stands near the amplifiers. He’s gonna pick that up and play for us. How cool is that?!

I also like to throw the photo up on social media. Invariably, people will start commenting about their experiences at the venue or about the band I’ve come to see. A few times, I’ve actually had people come up to me shortly after to let me know they’re here as well. Like I said, you’re never really alone.

4. Have a drink. I don’t need alcohol to enhance my good time. The band is more than enough for me! But I do like to sample the local brews at the gig. I never drink more than two in order to maintain self-control. (Plus, at my age, hangovers really hurt!) I suppose it’s the cop in me. Still, let’s have a beer, take in our surroundings, and chill. Also, be friendly with the people around you. You never know who you might meet. When I saw Midnight Oil, I met a guy who plays guitar for Peter Frampton. That’s plenty interesting to me. And then people around you love to talk about the band we all came to see. It’s fun to share experiences.

5. I don’t play the band’s music the day of the show. I know people who love to blast the band on the way to the venue. I don’t. I want to clear my head of everything I know about the band so I can take in what’s coming without expectations. I want the band to surprise me.

I also refuse to look at setlists from prior shows. Again, it’s about the surprise. Maybe they’ll play something here that they didn’t there. Maybe I’ll avoid being upset because I didn’t hear what was played elsewhere. It’s all good. After all, this is my show.

6. I don’t wear the band’s t-shirt or any other merchandise. That’s an odd one, I know. But for me, it’s part of the mind-clearing exercise. I’m wearing a Dark Side of the Moon t-shirt for this gig. No reason. I just am. When the band is done, there’s an above average chance I’ll buy one of the band’s shirts, which I’ll probably wear to a different band’s gig. That levels the proverbial playing field. I think. Plus, the band gets my financial support.

7. Obey the photography rules. If the band says no photos, that’s it for me. I won’t do it. I refuse to be that guy. if I do take photos with my cell phone, I do what I can to be quick and creative. I don’t want to block anyone’s view. Lord knows I hate when they do it to me!

8. Video? I’d rather not. Few things drive me crazier than seeing a link for a video on YouTube featuring a band I admire in concert, only to find shaky amateur video from the back of the room with crappy sound. I’d rather leave video to the pros. The one exception might be to grab the sound of a local band to hype them up on my social media. But those moments are rare. Just take it in and enjoy.

9. Let the crowd filter out. When the show is over, it’s time to make my way to the exit. If my back is bad, I make myself one of the last people to leave. That way, I’m not holding anybody up. I can take my time and make sure I get out safely and painlessly. Maybe I’ll even get a chance to talk to someone in the band. Speaking of which …

10. Get those interview requests in quickly! Depending on the size of the show, I might try to talk to one or more of the band members to inquire about an interview. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t. Either way, I make an effort to reach out. If I’m lucky, I just might get the opportunity.

Going to a show with me is an enjoyable experience. I promise.

Wanna come? Gimme a shout!

^ — I know that statement makes me come across as a bit of a dick. But here’s the thing: I don’t care.

#cirdecsongs

You can find all my socials at https://dot.cards/cedric_hendrix

Would you like to have your music reviewed? Contact me at cirdecsongs@gmail.com